


Close Your Eyes

by LittleLynn



Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Canon-Typical Violence, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Infidelity, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Smut, Infidelity, M/M, Repressed Feelings, confused feelings, he hasnt, just a lot of feelings, they both think Eggsy has moved on in the year without harry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-28
Updated: 2017-10-01
Packaged: 2019-01-06 15:58:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12214107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleLynn/pseuds/LittleLynn
Summary: Harry Hart makes a point of not lying outside of work. He does far too much of it in the name of Kingsman that he prefers to keep it out of her personal life entirely. Big lies, little lies, white lies, lies of omission, deceptions, tricks, he avoids all of it unless it is in the name of Kingsman, things had always seemed far simpler that way, and there was nothing gentlemanly about being deceitful.He told a lot of lies on that plane though.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> I'm gunna level with you this was initially just going to be a short character study into Harry on that plane to Cambodia, then i decided it actually worked well as a prologue for a canon-compliant fic so here we are. I'll try to plan out the chapters to give myself a guide and you guys a gauge, but tbh I dont know exactly what is going to happen. 
> 
> Title stolen shamelessly from Little Lies by Fleetwood Mac because coming up with titles is such a pain.
> 
> Anyway I hope you enjoy, I'll get the first proper (and decently lengthed) chapter up as quickly as I can!

Harry Hart makes a point of not lying outside of work. He does far too much of it in the name of Kingsman that he prefers to keep it out of his personal life entirely. Big lies, little lies, white lies, lies of omission, deceptions, tricks, he avoids all of it unless it is in the name of Kingsman, things had always seemed far simpler that way, and there was nothing gentlemanly about being deceitful.

He told a lot of lies on that plane though.

Harry rationalised that they didn’t count, they were to help Eggsy, not to hurt. Harry would sacrifice his happiness for Eggsy’s every time. Perhaps it was the truth that would have hurt them both more, maybe that was why he did it. And he was a spy, the lies had come so easily, even if his heart had choked over them.

Harry supposed he finally understood Oscar Wilde when he said ‘the truth is rarely pure and never simple’.

It was a sign of trust, that Eggsy would confide about his girlfriend in him when he knew it was against the rules, trusted Harry not to turn on him, to support him instead of berate him. It was only his many years as a spy that allowed him to keep control over his expression and his hands, to keep mixing their drinks as Eggsy confided in him, to pretend he was unaffected.

It had been a year, and they had only been a what if anyway, of course Eggsy had moved on. Maybe there hadn’t even been anything to move on from, maybe that had only ever existed in Harry’s head.

Harry took a moment to compose himself, and then the first lie came.

“Do you know what went through my mind before I was shot? Absolutely nothing.”

Harry said it calmly, convincingly, as if it was a simple truth. As if the only thing he could think of in that moment, when Valentine had the gun pointed at him, hadn’t been Eggsy. As if his mind hadn’t been consumed with thoughts of him. Wondering if he would ever see him again, knowing that he wouldn’t, regretting leaving things unsaid, praying to a god neither of them believed in that Eggsy would be okay. Fuck the world, Eggsy had been all he cared about.

More lies came after that; claiming that he’d never been in love while looking the very person loved with a terrifying intensity straight in the eye.

Perhaps the biggest lie of all had been pretending that it wasn’t tearing Harry apart inside just to know Eggsy had found someone and that it wasn’t him.

But still, Harry wore a carefully constructed smile and told Eggsy that it was okay, that they would save her, that he’d get his chance to be with her, that there was nothing wrong with being in love. And there wasn’t, Harry was too, after all. When all was said and done Harry cared far more about Eggsy’s happiness than his own anyway.

Eggsy said ‘I missed you Harry’ and it sounded so much like ‘I loved you Harry’ that Harry almost broke. But he was too well-trained for that, holding his illusion of simple sage advice without a waver.

It was for the best anyway, Eggsy didn’t belong with someone as old and dull as him, he deserved someone just as young and bright and beautiful as he was. Harry wouldn’t stand in the way of that.

His support wasn’t a lie, but he knew that if they survived this, his happiness was about to become one.

Merlin would notice, probably already had, and when they returned home and returned Eggsy to his girl, he would offer Harry a scotch and a squeeze of his shoulder and somehow that would have to be comfort enough.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Kudos are cherished and comments fuel the next chapters <3
> 
> Obviously I cannot remember what was said in the film word for word so please forgive me, I'll make it exact when the dvd comes out :') 
> 
> I /might/ throw in some Harry omc (in a wishful but ultimately futile attempt to get over Eggsy) in the early chapters so beware. 
> 
> Come say hi on [tumblr](http://shadyanne.tumblr.com/)!


	2. One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have tentatively put in 15 chapters as that is what my rough plan has come out as, but it might change! Also I'll try to get every chapter up to at least 3k but they may well vary for this fic. 
> 
> This chapter is still mainly exposition and harry introspection on things we know happen, the next chapter is where the fic 'proper' will start, if that makes sense (new events, things and conversations taking up more space than internal Harry thoughts :') ) 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy!

 

Harry had little idea how he was supposed to feel. He supposed he felt mainly numb. They had succeeded in stopping Poppy and saving the world, but Merlin was gone, gone when Harry knew it should have been him.

When Eggsy had stepped on that mine Harry’s heart had stopped, desperately trying to think of a way to save him but his brain was almost unable to think amidst the thick panic flooding through him. Merlin had the solution first, and Harry’s relief had stopped him picking up on the delicate lie, that half a second, not long enough to get away, but long enough for someone to take Eggy’s place. It should have been him, he’d have happily laid his life down for either of theirs.

 But there hadn’t been time to argue, to cry, to protest, all that would have done would be to make Merlin’s sacrifice in vain and Harry would not allow that. Harry had never realised what a beautiful singing voice Merlin had had until then.

 It was a fight after that, Merlin clearing the gate for them to get in. Eggsy threw the grenade for him to bat into the compound, proving Harry’s hand eye coordination was back and that despite it all, Harry would always have Eggsy’s full trust.

Those moments fighting alongside Eggsy, so perfectly in sync, Harry felt more alive than he ever had. They didn’t need to speak, it didn’t matter that it had been a full year apart – for Eggsy anyway, the nature of Harry’s head injury and amnesia made it feel just like yesterday to him – they were still the formidable fighting team he knew they always could be. Everything between them had been unspoken, against the goons, against Poppy’s dogs and Charlie, against Whiskey. It didn’t matter who they faced, they were seamless together. It was exhilarating.    

But now that the fighting was over a reality began to press back in around him. They were back on the plane home, there was time to mourn, to really feel what had happened out there. Time for Harry to finally really accept that Kingsman was gone, all of his colleagues, as well as Merlin. Kingsman had been his life, the only person left on the earth who Harry cared about was sat on this plane with him and for the first time that truly sunk in.

He didn’t even have an empty house to go home to at the end of the day.

Harry considered what that meant. He had somehow always believed that Kingsman was _safe_ , he balked internally at himself, realising that he had genuinely believed that. They lost agents occasionally, but never often and Harry had always believed that if he trained the new recruits well enough, if he was rigorous with his own skills then there would not be a reason to lose someone ever again. There would never be a mistake like he made with Eggsy’s father again.

But this hadn’t been a single agent, this had been Kingsman as a whole. All of them wiped out, sheer dumb luck that Eggsy had not been home at the time. Everyone else was dead. All of them. Harry looked across at Eggsy’s tired face and for the first time wondered what he had been _thinking_ bringing the young man into this life and thinking he was doing the boy a favour as he did it. Kingsman was dangerous, their life was _dangerous_.

Harry wondered then if he even wanted to rebuild, if it wasn’t better, safer, if he told Eggsy no, Kingsman is finished and we should let it lie. He could really become a lepidopterist, and Eggsy was a so full of talent that he would find something else. All that really mattered was that they would be safe and alive, with none of the rest of this save the world by sacrificing yourself rubbish.

Harry wanted to take Eggsy away from Kingsman, take him somewhere safe, but he knew in his heart that Eggsy would never accept it. That Eggsy foolishly thought that saving the world was worth his life. Harry knew better, nothing could ever be worth that.

He had thought Eggsy had been asleep, the young man never being this quiet before, and it was only as Harry rose to make himself a drink that he even noticed Eggsy was actually awake.

“Didn’t think that was really your speed.” Eggsy commented, indicating to the straight vodka Harry had just poured himself. He was right of course, Harry hated vodka even when it was mixed with something.

“It has been one of those days.” Harry responded, throwing back the drink which had been slightly larger than a double in one go. That hadn’t been particularly gentlemanly either, and by the raised eyebrows Eggsy had noticed. “Would you like one?” Harry asked, pouring another, slightly smaller drink out for himself.

“Nah, m’alright.” Eggsy replied, watching Harry a little too closely, like he couldn’t believe he was back, like he couldn’t believe they made it out alive. Like he was a little concerned about the third drink of vodka harry gulped back.

He made it his last though, returning to his seat and trying not to sigh outwardly. Or stare to obviously at Eggsy, too longingly. A silence spread out between them and for the first time it felt tense.

“Your girl, is she alright?” Harry asked, clearing his throat, looking for something to fill the silence, which was unlike him anyway.

“Yeah. She got the antidote in time.” Eggsy nodded slowly, looking between his hands and the floor, stealing a glance up at Harry.

“I’m glad.” Harry smiled, and he meant it because of course he did, a life saved, an innocent life saved, was always a good thing.

“Yeah.” Eggsy added, silence stretching between them again, Eggsy looking at his hands instead of Harry. Harry used the opportunity to really take him in again without being noticed.

He looked better than he had a year ago, Harry was sure of it, more handsome, a little more grown into himself. Certainly more at home in his suits and glasses. He looked good, but then he always had. He looked a little older than a single year should have made him, the nature of the work, Harry knew. The nature of grief, he wondered at, before shutting the thought down quickly. Eggsy had clearly moved on, as he should have, as Harry should have been relieved to see. He wanted him to be happy more than anything, even more than he wanted to be the one who made him happy.

“She, uh, I think she wants to get married.” Eggsy said haltingly and Harry stilled.

He drew in a careful breath, clamped down on his expression, his body language, his movements. Manufactured them into something natural, something happy, something resembling what he should feel and nothing approaching the empty void he could feel.

“That’s wonderful Eggsy.” Harry smiled, it felt tight on his face, he could only hope it didn’t actually show.

For all that he was a super spy, Harry Hart could not read Eggsy in that moment, couldn’t decipher the look he gave him. Searching, confused, rejected, relieved; Harry couldn’t tell. Eggsy was schooling his expressions just as hard – though not as expertly – as Harry himself was. He wondered for a moment when things had gotten so estranged between them, then he remember that he had spent a year dead and gone to the world all but literally.

“Sure, but like, Kingsman would never allow that right?” Eggsy asked, and Harry couldn’t work out why. Was he asking Harry if he was going to have to choose between his job or his girlfriend? Harry would never ask him to make such a choice, and he wasn’t even sure if they had jobs anymore.

“Eggsy, Kingsman is gone.” Harry pointed out, not unkindly. “And I would never stand in the way of your happiness.” Harry continued, as much as a mantra to himself than to Eggsy. He would not stand in the way of Eggsy’s happiness.

Maybe if Kingsman had survived, if Eggsy still had Roxy then Harry would have been able to distance himself from this, would have been able to worry about his own wellbeing and place a safe distance between Eggsy and his own heart. If Kingsman had survived then maybe he would even have been able to have himself sent on a mission when the happy day came around.

But they had lost so many people, and Eggsy had only just got him back. It would be unkind, it would hurt Eggsy, if he distanced himself now.  

“But, but we’re gunna rebuild right? Harry?” Eggsy pressed when Harry didn’t immediately reply.

“We can.” Harry replied evasively, Eggsy turning a look on him like a small puppy that had just been denied an ear scratch. “We don’t have to. We could live normal lives, I could actually become a lepidopterist, you could, well, you could do whatever you wanted if you put your mind to it.” _And you would be safe_.    

“What? Harry no. What are you even talking about.” Eggsy looked panicked, maybe he’d already lost so much he wasn’t ready to lose Kingsman as well.

“I’m saying maybe someone else can save the world next time.” Harry said gently, feeling every single one of his years in that moment.

“But what if they _don’t_. We were the ones that stopped Valentine, and now we’re the ones that stopped Poppy and that arsehole president yeah? And I’ve only been here a year, that’s not even counting everything Kingsman must have done before I got here. The world needs us Harry.” Eggsy argued, Harry almost thought his final plea sounded more like _I need you, Harry_ , but he quickly berated himself for being such a fanciful old fool.

“You’ve had a very disproportionate number of world saving missions in your time with Kingsman.” Harry commented dryly, only really realising for the first time how true it was. “The stakes aren’t normally this high. It tends to just be standard crime rings, high-profile kidnappings and megalomaniacal businessmen that need to be stopped.”

“Harry…” Eggsy trailed off, looking at Harry so closely now, like he was trying to figure out where this was coming from, this desire to lead a normal life that was hiding his overwhelming need to keep Eggsy out of harm’s way, and Kingsman was very firmly _harms way_. “Do you not want to do this anymore?” Eggsy asked, sounding far more vulnerable than he probably wanted to. Harry knew what was being said, those green puppy dog eyes boring into his and screaming _I cant do this without you Harry_. It was extremely effective, the idea of leaving Eggsy feeling alone was not one Harry could abide. The idea of Eggsy trying to rebuild Kingsman on his own, because he didn’t know how to let go, was also unacceptable.

“Sorry. I am just being an old man.” Harry forced a smile. “Of course we’ll rebuild. We are Kingsman after all, we endure.”

Eggsy smiled at him, all relief and new-found purpose, before sobering again.

“I really did miss you Harry. With everything that’s happened…I don’t think I could do any of it if you hadn’t come back.” Eggsy said, the second part almost more to himself than Harry, before looking up again. “Be careful yeah?” Eggsy wasn’t trying to hide the vulnerability in his face, was trusting Harry with it, making sure Harry knew that he couldn’t go through losing him again.

They loved each other. It was just a shame that Eggsy loved Harry, but Harry was in love with Eggsy. Life could be ever such a cruel mistress.

“Of course.”

Eggsy’s phone lit up with a notification of some kind, brightening with a picture of a beautiful woman smiling into the camera with Eggsy and his dog.

Harry’s smile went tight but he didn’t let it falter.

They landed back at Statesmen and things seemed both rushed and relaxed, like the releasing of a breath you’d held just slightly too long. They were debriefed and made comfortable, there were mixed feelings over Whiskey, no one believed they’d done the wrong thing, but some were saddened nonetheless. Ginger Ale became the new Whiskey, but would first have to find herself a replacement Ginger Ale to train. Statesmen gave them access to their resources along with two of their own agents – Tequila for a bit of Kingsman polish and Agent Gin, a more senior agent – to help support Kingsman while they rebuilt; because in reality Harry and Eggsy could not do it alone. Ginger also agreed to visit often and help them find a suitable replacement for Merlin.

The first drink from the Kingsman distillery had been in Merlin’s name; a single malt scotch and a quite moment to remember him. Harry knew it was what he would have wanted.

Before long Harry and Eggsy found themselves on a Kingsman jet bound for home, with Tequila, Ginger and Gin in tow.

Things happened very fast when they got home. Eggsy staying barely a day, just enough time to check on his friends, mother and sister, before boarding a plane to Sweden to go see his girl. He had wanted Harry to come with him, meet her. But Harry had made excuses, they he was needed here, they had too much to do, he would meet her later.

And indeed he did, because Eggsy did not return to London alone, but with a beautiful Swedish princess. Harry stoically refused to dislike her simply because of the hand clasped in Eggsy’s, he was above such things, and she was truly lovely.

“I am so glad.” Tilde said quietly to him, while Eggsy was distracted by some nonsense Tequila was spouting about tea and how it was better cold, Harry was proud of how vehemently Eggsy was protesting this. Harry looked to Tilde, asking with his brow what she meant. “He missed you so much, this year was hard on him. I could always tell when he was being pulled into a memory of you. He would get this sad look, like he was a hundred miles away, and he couldn’t hide it, no matter how good a spy he is. So I am very glad that he has you back, he needed you.”

“I am glad to be back also.” Was all Harry could think to say, his eyes wandering to Eggsy, hating the idea that he had ever caused him pain.

“And I am glad that I get to meet you!” Tilde added with a beaming smile, Harry turned back to her and did his best to return it.

Harry retreated when he calculated that it would not be rude, disappearing into the library that was really more like a glorified study. They were all crammed into a Kingsman safehouse while the rebuilding began, not ideal, but workable, even with the lack of a proper library. The door pushed open after a little while and Eggsy came into the room.

“Thought I’d find you in ‘ere. You alright? You disappeared on us.” Eggsy said, plopping himself down gracelessly into the armchair opposite Harry’s.

“Fine, just tried.”

“I know how you feel. American’s are exhausting. I mean cold tea for fuck sake that is disgusting.” Eggsy said in an amusingly exasperated tone.

“Quite.” Harry smiled and it must have looked particularly tired because Eggsy paused.

“Do you want me to leave you be?”

“No.” Harry replied, because he was a masochist and would never ask Eggsy to leave if he was willing to stay.

“You sure, you did say you were dead tired.”

“Your presence is not one I find tiring.” Harry answered and the bright smile he got from Eggsy in return was worth more to Harry than all the money in the Statesmen reserve.

There was another silence between them, they had become more common lately; wanting to spend time around each other, but both of them often stuttering over finding something to say. There was too much to say, too much it felt too late to say. Harry could tell Eggsy wanted to say something though, so he kept quiet, giving Eggsy the space to speak.

“I think I’m going to propose to Tilde tonight.” Eggsy said, slowly carefully. He was studying Harry, as if watching for a certain reaction, but Harry didn’t know why, or what it was he was looking for, so he just put on his best ‘that’s wonderful’ expression which he knew was flawless regardless of the roiling knots in his stomach, because he was, after all, an excellent liar.

“That’s wonderful Eggsy. She will be lucky to have you.” Harry said, scrawling sincerity over his face to the best of his abilities. Eggsy just watched him, Harry still had no idea what it was Eggsy was watching for and forced himself to smile, it went on a little too long for comfort before Eggsy sat back and spoke again. He almost looked disappointed with what Harry had said, Harry wondered for a moment if he’d failed to keep his crumbling heart away from his face.

“Right. Yeah. Yeah it’s gunna be great, I love her.” Eggsy said, sounding almost like he was trying to convince himself of this, but Harry supposed that was normal, proposing was nerve-wracking after all. Not that he would know.

“I am very happy for you.”

“Yeah.”

Harry went back into the main room with Eggsy, waving them off when he and Tilde left for a nice dinner somewhere, Eggsy throwing one last searching look back at Harry and Harry did his best to give him a reassuring smile in return.

They returned with their big announcement a few hours later, everyone in their little gathered party bursting with delight at the news. Eggsy hadn’t bought a ring yet, but he was making grand promises about him, all swagger and unpolished charm. And he was happy, Harry could see that, anyone could see that. And Harry decided that was enough for him, Eggsy being happy, no matter who with, was enough. It would become a familiar lie he told himself, anyway.

Just a few days later Eggsy asked Harry to be his best man and Harry had no idea how to refuse Eggsy anything so he of course humbly accepted the honour. He helped Eggsy pick out the ring, helped him deal with Tilde’s parents, readied him for life as a public figure, refreshed him on etiquette when dining with royals. Harry found the best way to cope was to simply not spare himself a second thought, he didn’t matter.

He missed Merlin often, though he knew what he would say, how he would berate Harry for doing this to himself. Tell him to buck up and look after himself but ultimately offer him a drink and a quiet place to be.

“I still can’t believe any of this.” Eggsy said, smiling and looking to Harry as the tailor continued to take his measurements for the clothes he would need for the royal wedding. “Me, a fucking prince! Shit.”

“You’ll be a fine prince Eggsy.”

“They’re insisting on calling me prince Gary. Apparently Eggsy ain’t good enough.” Eggsy complained lightly, wrinkling his nose at the name in a way that was extremely cute. “Also you I get that you’re happy for me and everything, but you’ve gotta admit this is gunna be a bit of a ball-ache what with being a spy and a public figure.”

“I am not yet sure how difficult it will be,” Harry mused aloud, “so long as you manage to appear just another perfectly boring royal then the vast majority of the world will have no idea who you are. Just try to avoid being in O.K. magazine and you should be fine.” The world in general didn’t tend to pay attention to foreign royals, Eggsy would just have to avoid missions in Sweden – or perhaps Scandinavia at large to be safe – but should otherwise be fine.

“Aw damn Harry, I had plans of my own reality show.” Eggsy teased, laughing when Harry gave him a particularly withering look.

“You could of course retire from Kingsman, really take on the role of prince properly.” Harry suggested, though he knew Eggsy wouldn’t go for it, that had become clear, Eggsy was not going to let go of Kingsman, rankled against each and every one of Harry’s suggestions that they could let it lie, have safe, normal lives.

He wondered absently if Eggsy was afraid that losing Kingsman would also mean losing Harry again, he’d tried to separate these notions but Eggsy was still adamant in his determination to rebuild Kingsman. It was selfish of him really, to try and deny the world Eggsy’s protection just because he didn’t want him to get hurt. Age had made him soft – or had that been Eggsy? – either way he knew he would never pass the Kingsman test now, he’d never shoot the dog. Following orders blindly is dangerous, and probably at least in part to blame for how Arthur had managed to ally with Valentine without any of them noticing.

Harry hoped that Eggsy knew that he had had just as profound effect on Harry’s life as Harry had had on his.

The tailor continued and Harry couldn’t help but be proud of how well Eggsy wore the regalia. He looked good, he always did. No matter how smart the outfit he was put in, Eggsy never lost his trademark swagger, it was something Harry was infinitely grateful for, just one of many things that he loved.

The engagement was short, especially for a royal one, but still stretched nine months. The money from Statesmen had allowed them to afford some seriously accelerate rebuilding and the Kingsman Tailor shop – and accompanying bunker – was already finished, with the conversions to a suitable, large country estate also well underway to being able to function as headquarters again. The Statesmen had even funded the rebuilding of Harry’s house, something Harry firmly believed was wrought from guilt over keeping him locked in a comfortable but no less tiny room for a year.

It wasn’t the same, Mr. Pickle was gone, as were his butterflies, but it was a place to lay his head. The sad truth was they had been the only personal touches Harry had truly lost in the explosion; no photos, no keepsakes, nothing. He appreciated the gesture, even if he didn’t make it home most nights – a side-effect of being named the new Arthur (not that there had exactly been any competition for the role, the Statesmen had sort of just started calling Harry that because they were tried to two Galahad’s and with a proud smile from Eggsy, that had been that).

He liked Tequila, even if he did grate on his nerves more frequently than was ideal – and there were definite traces of _rodeo clown_ still on him, though Harry was doing his best to dispel them. Ginger – because they all still called her Ginger, even if it wasn’t technically her handle anymore – was a delight and Harry found he enjoyed spending time with her, she was witty and smart but also surprisingly kind for someone in their line of work. Harry hadn’t yet formed an opinion on Agent Gin, he was perfectly agreeable – if a little American at times – friendly, capable, but also slightly too informal and unprofessional for Harry’s immediate tastes. But Gin was also a peer, younger than Harry himself but not drastically so, and had spent his life dedicated to the Statesman, so they had things in common after all. Harry expected he would get to know the agent better, when he transferred to Kingsman full time in a few weeks’ time after finishing up with an unexpected loose end in America.

If Harry was being honest, he hadn’t gotten to know his new colleges as well as he should have, finding himself a little consumed by Eggsy, not that this was surprising.

It hurt, but Harry made sure he was the finest best man Eggsy could possibly have, and when the big day came around he gave Eggsy the pep-talk he needed in the dressing room, painfully reminiscent of when they had first met. He kept the rings safe, smiled and clapped at the appropriate moments of the ceremony, gave a touching speech at the ensuing reception, waved the happy couple off on their honeymoon and when he returned home that evening he drank until he couldn’t think anymore. But he lived alone after all, so no one needed to know about that.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked it, next update will be as soon as I manage (tomorrow if you're lucky, Monday if you're not).
> 
> [tumbs](http://shadyanne.tumblr.com/)!


	3. Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for typo's and whatnot, I tend to proofread after I've already posted then go back the day after to correct things, its a bad habit but whatcha gunna do ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ (whatcha gunna do is read a couple days after I post the chapter if they bug you because it'll probs be de-typoed by then :') )

 

“Is the hat really necessary?” Tequila complained, trying to roll his large shoulders in his newly tailored Kingsman bullet-proof suit. Harry had had him outfitted with a bowler hat for now; he simply hadn’t looked smart enough without it, his hair not long enough to be coiffed smartly.

“Yes.” Harry answered firmly, “but it is poor etiquette to wear a hat indoors, so you may remove it upon entrance. If you dislike the hat then I suggest you grow your hair to such a length that it can be styled to befit a Kingsman.”

Tequila huffed, but didn’t protest further verbally. “I still think it’s too tight on my shoulders.” Tequila grumbled, Harry sighed and looked to the heavens for strength, they had had this conversation four times already.

“I assure you it is tailored perfectly to your build.”

“I don’t know man, feel’s like it’ll rip the second I have to get fightin’.”

“You seem to have a rather inflated idea of the size of your own shoulder muscles.” Harry clipped back, surprised when a somewhat rambunctious laugh sounded out from the entrance of the shop.

“What a moment to walk in. You really are something Harry Hart.” Gin grinned, shaking his head in amusement as he approached.

“A good something I hope.” Harry replied dryly, surprising himself at his own good humour. The last few weeks had been…difficult, unable to avoid the gaping Eggsy-shaped void in his life while the young man was on his honeymoon. With his wife. Because he was married now. Needless to say his mood had been less than stellar, being short and sarcastic with people was unbecoming, but Harry had been hard-pressed to help it these past few days.

“Naturally.” Gin winked back at him, his brash American charm nothing like Eggsy’s delightful cheeky charm, but not entirely awful either. “Now Tequila quit bothering Arthur, he’s got more important things to do than babysit you. Go on, get.” Gin effectively silenced what could have become hours more griping from Tequila and Harry was glad of it, he was going to take Tequila to the armoury next, but he could honestly use a break from the young man so he didn’t mind his dismissal terribly.

“If he fiddles with – and _ruins_ – that perfect Windsor knot one more time I may just strangle him with the next one.” Harry said, good humour and genuine frustration blending together, Gin laughed again, loud and too boisterous for a spy, in Harry’s humble opinion.

“He’ll get there. Practice makes perfect n’all that.”

“An awful lot of practice.”

“He’s a good agent, just a bit…”

“Unpolished.” Harry offered, though it was more of a statement than a suggestion.

“Exactly. He’s a good kid, just new to this. Like your Galahad, bit rough around the edges is all.”

“Eggsy is not rough around the edges. And if he is it is part of his charm. He knows how to tie a tie.” Harry rankled a little and got probably slightly too defensive as Gin raised his hands in supplication.

“I didn’t mean no offence. Defensive of your protégé I get it. When’s he back from his sexcation anyway?” Gin laughed again, proving it was supposed to be in good humour, but it was far too American a joke for Harry. That and he was doing whatever he could not to think about the fact that Eggsy was on his honeymoon.

“Soon.” Harry answered, in reality it could be any moment now, but he was trying not to fixate on watching the door.

“Ah well, if you ever need a break from these young ones then I’m always available for a drink with a good-lookin gentleman.” Gin said with a wink, and Harry didn’t have time to decipher if he was being serious or not, because the door to the shop had opened part-way through his sentence.

Gin instantly lost all of Harry’s attention as Eggsy stole it away, he wasn’t wearing a suit, but he’d look good in anything. He had a gentle tan, making his hair seem blonde and he looked as though he had been smiling just a moment before, but it was now slipping off his face. Harry tried not to be dejected by the idea that Eggsy wasn’t as desperate to see him as Harry was to see Eggsy. He knew it was like that anyway, after all.

“Eggsy.” Harry beamed, could tell his face was lighting up and could only hope that both Gin and Eggsy would put it down to Harry being pleased to see his protégé after an absence.

“’Alright Harry?” Eggsy smiled at him, like he had missed Harry too, even though it had only been a few weeks. His eyes then drifted to Gin and closed off a little, like he wasn’t entirely sure what Gin was doing there.

“Gin was just helping me with Tequila.” Harry explained, though why he felt like he had to explain himself he wasn’t sure.

“If just kicking him out to give Harry a bit of peace counts as helping.” Gin grinned, Eggsy gave Gin a look that said so clearly to Harry _doesn’t much look like peace if you’re still here gabbing away_ and Harry had to suppress his laugh. Gin didn’t know Eggsy like Harry didn’t, he’d never pick up on his expression so they didn’t need to worry. Eggsy noticed his amusement though and shot him another winning, cheeky smile.

“Not sure Harry needs saving.” Eggsy replied, both he and Harry slightly surprised by the ever so slightly hostile edge to his voice.

“Well damn, you two are protective of each other.” Gin commented with another good-natured chuckle, patting Harry on the back and heading back down into the bunker.

“So, what did I miss?” Eggsy asked, and Harry was surprised that he didn’t seem to want to talk about his honeymoon or new wife, instead just looking up at Harry with those eyes, reminding Harry of just how intoxicating he found it to have the young man’s full and devoted attention. 

“More building works; new headquarters is almost completed, as is my house. And we will soon be able to behind our gadget productions again, though it will be a challenge until the position of Merlin is filled.”

“Only me and you to outfit though, hardly requires a big amount of production.” Eggsy pointed out, voice tinged with sadness.

“Quite. Perhaps not for too long though, we’ll be having a meeting soon about nominating new candidates for training, requirements, how many we can take on and such. So it might not be a terrible idea to start thinking on that.”

“…Harry I’ve no idea what to even look for in a candidate. Posh-git? Boffin? Military?” Eggsy said a little panicked, Harry smiled softly, finding it endearing that Eggsy could save the world twice over but balk at a small decisions.

“Just use your instincts. You weren’t any of those things, yet here you are, Kingsman’s best agent.” Harry pointed out, more delighted than he should have been when a small blush dusted Eggsy’s face under the praise.

It had almost stopped by the time Harry got shot, praising Eggsy so much that he was better at controlling his sweet response to it, but it appeared he was out of practice; Harry was glad.

“Nah, not with you ‘ere Harry.”

“Only one of us has saved the world twice.”

“I couldn’t have done it neither of those times without your help.”

“It is very gallant of you to share the praise.”

“A trait becoming a gentleman.” Eggsy teased, smile bright and contagious.

“Very much so.”

A moment stretched between them, broken harshly by Harry getting a call on his glasses which he reluctantly accepted.

“Arthur, there seems to be a loose end left in England; we’ve picked up info about a group of golden circle employees trying to start their own cartel in Birmingham. Would be small game accept there is a worry they may be using some of Poppy’s leftover drug stocks to get up and running.” Ginger said while sending relevant files.

“Meaning contaminated drugs.”

“Yes. While not world ending, and we do now have the cure, I think we’d all rather avoid another outbreak, lest it cause a panic among the public. Not to mention what I’d like to do to anyone who willingly worked for that psychopath.” Ginger finished with a grumble, and Harry had to agree. “Obviously this is your turf, so I figured it could be a good mission for the Kingsmen.” Ginger finished, meaning Harry and Eggsy of course, as they only surviving Kingsman, Gin and Tequila were on loan more than Kingsmen.

They hadn’t had a mission in a while, they simply didn’t have the manpower or resources for it currently, passing on tips to the relevant authorities instead. But she had done well to send this one to them, it would be good to get out in the field and this would be a low-risk mission.

“Excellent idea Ginger, we’ll go get ready.” Harry confirmed, glad to be able to get out and do something that was neither paper work nor dealing with a friendly but somewhat grating ex-rodeo clown.

“Wassat?” Eggsy asked and Harry gave him a Look, though if he was being honest he quite enjoyed Eggsy’s patois, but he enjoyed the cheeky smile Eggsy flashed him in response to his look even more.

“We have a mission, some leftovers from the Golden Circle that need to be taken care of.” Harry explained, heading to the dressing room to take them down to the transport to the new headquarters, Eggsy following easily behind him.

“Yes Harry!” Eggsy said, grinning from ear to ear and beginning to buzz with excitement; anyone would think he’d been bored on his honeymoon.

 They outfitted themselves and headed out towards Birmingham swiftly. Their gadgets were curtesy of Statesman currently, which meant they were no less sophisticated technologically but generally slightly less sleek and to Harry’s tastes. He much preferred carrying a lighter than a baseball; no one would suspect a lighter on a gentleman, a baseball on the other hand, would immediately raise suspicion.

Still, they were perfectly functional and Harry had made do with far less. And Statemen had produced a line of umbrellas for Harry until they could begin making their own again.

There was little finesse on this mission, using stealth Harry and Eggsy approached the seemingly abandoned warehouse their intel had confirmed was being used.

 _Ready?_ Harry asked Eggsy with his eyes, both of them stood pressed against either side of the door, poised to spring forth into the room. The twinkle in Eggsy’s eyes clear replied _I was born ready bruv_.

Harry spared a moment to suppress and smile and roll his eye before rather dramatically kicking open the door – not usually his style, but this mission was going to be particularly satisfying and they both knew it. Because people _had_ died, just because they’d managed to save the majority did not mean that a lot of people hadn’t died before the antidote had reached them. Merlin had died. Harry liked to think he was above revenge, and this was a legitimate mission; but if they were both a little more ruthless than they needed to be, he figured it was warranted.

They moved together so smoothly that it felt as though their heartbeats were in sync. No words were needed for them to perfectly coordinate themselves around each other, seamlessly taking out the remnants of the Golden Circle. Harry provided cover with his umbrella while Eggsy tucked behind him and shot down the sniper on the roof and the people trying to flank them. They swapped places effortlessly, Eggsy sweeping the umbrella out of Harry’s hands, freeing him to take a baseball, activate is and throw it towards a group of three who had foolishly believed they hadn’t been spotted yet, before turning his gun on the last two guards, who actually looked like they were trying to make an escape rather than an attack; but Harry couldn’t allow that lest they return with reinforcements.

There were only a few goons, nothing compared to what they had faced at Poppy’s compound, honestly they hardly broke a sweat, none of their enemies even coming close to breaking their tight defence.

“That was a little disappointing if I’m being honest.” Eggsy said, rolling his shoulders, nary a hair out of place.

“We’re not done yet. And this is work not play.” Harry pointed out, though they both knew that Harry found the fight just as exhilarating as Eggsy did, perhaps more so since Eggsy had come into his life and woken him up from his boring routines.

“Yeah but you know what they say, do what you love and never work a day in your life.” Eggsy flashed him that blinding smile again and Harry was sure he could spend his entire life stacking shelves in Waitrose and as long as Eggsy was with him, he’d love it.

The ex-Golden-Circle members had poorly barricaded themselves in a back room, nothing they couldn’t break through easily, though Harry imagined all guns would be trained on the door. Not to worry, their suits were bulletproof and his umbrella was still in perfect working condition.

“Shall we?”

“Would you like to do the honours?” Eggsy asked, handing Harry his own baseball grenade with a comical flourish.

“Gladly.” Harry replied, bringing Eggsy behind him, taking a suitable number of steps back, priming the baseball and rolling it towards the feebly barricaded door before opening out the umbrella and giving himself and Eggsy cover from the blast.

Shrieks of surprised came from within the room at the blast and the inhabitants of it began shooting wildly at the blown-open door way, there was a dust fog around it from the small explosion and Harry and Eggsy simply waited until the Golden Circle members had wasted all of their bullets on nothing and needed to reload before pressing in.

They didn’t get time to reload, Harry and Eggsy ending them all with a swift single shot to the head. Lorens Larsson; who they had identified as the ringleader of this wannabe cartel attempted to beg and bargain.

“Wait! I have information, I know where Poppy kept, uh, stockpiles and, and, and – ” Was his truly poor attempt at a lie to keep himself safe.

“Nah.” Was all Eggsy said before shooting him clean between the eyes. Harry could tell they both found it rather satisfying.

All in all the whole thing had not even taken fifteen minutes.

“Here it is.” Harry said, pulling open the door to a storage room and revealing a wealth of likely contaminated drugs.

“Should we burn it all?” Eggsy asked, looking around them and Harry nodded, the good thing about cartels were they didn’t wish to be found by the authorities, so generally existed a safe distance away from civilians.

It didn’t take them much longer before the building was ablaze and the last fragments of the Golden Circle with it and they were on their way home.

“You know Harry, you never did teach me how to get blood out of a suit. Woulda been useful information.” Eggsy piped up, indicating to a small spatter of blood that had managed to splash onto his suit.

“Well, I’d be happy to give you a lesson on it.”

“Just like old times, ey?” Eggsy grinned at him, Eggsy smiled at Harry so often anyone would think that Harry had hung the moon and all the stars. It was so easy to forget, in moments like this, just after a successful mission, that anything between them was different, it felt exactly as it had a before he got shot: easy, natural and teetering on the edge of something more. Or perhaps it was only Harry that had ever felt that, perhaps he was just projecting what he wanted onto Eggsy, and Eggsy really did see him only as a beloved mentor. It was difficult, when Eggsy smiled at him like he did, it was bad for Harry’s heart, but he shared in it anyway, Eggsy’s smiles were nothing if not contagious to him.

The next day back at headquarters Harry found himself in Arthur’s chair running a rather informal meeting with his agents and Ginger over gathering new recruits.

“I think we will keep the process as close to the old way as possible; the same tests and trials at least. Though we will no longer be asking candidates to shoot their dogs, I am not interested in people blindly following orders, I care more about instincts. The final trial will be instead be the candidate placed in a scenario – manufactured of course and with blanks in case of failure – and they will be given to enough information to know that who they will be asked to shoot is not the culprit. The blind and unquestioned following of this order will be a failure, all other responses will be examined and we shall discuss together if it was a suitable response.” Harry explained, Eggsy clearly in full agreement about the removal of the final trial.

“Wait. Y’all used to give your candidates a dog, have them raise it, then ask them to shoot it?” Gin asked incredulously.

“Yes.”

“And _shooting_ it was how you passed?”

“It was a blank, but the candidate did not know that. And yes, it was.”

“That is all kinds of fucked up.” Tequila said shaking his head.

“You’re tellin’ me. You know I failed that trial, only got taken on because they were down a Galahad. Well, an’ I saved the world.” Eggsy said proudly.

“Good. Don’t think I could trust someone who could shoot a dog without no reason other than someone told you to.”

“I have since seen the flaws in this particular trial. Following orders is important, as is putting the mission above your own personal feelings, however _blindly_ following orders is not a good thing.” Harry elaborated, to the nodding agreement of everyone around the table.

“So how are we finding our candidates?” Tequila asked, moving the conversation on. Traditionally each agent would only nominate a single candidate, but they had more than one position to fill right now.

“However you wish. Though bear in mind they should have some level of athletic ability. We can’t train people from scratch so they will only fall at the first hurdle. They also must have at least some potential to develop the required polish of Kingsman.” Harry cautioned. “I am going to go through our files on the secret service and see if there are any more experienced candidates that would be eligible, we need more experienced agents if possible.”

“I’m thinking I might go diggin’ in the military discharge files. See what I can find.” Eggsy mused aloud, it didn’t surprise him that Eggsy would steer clear of the more pompous and traditionally Kingsman routes of recruitment.

“Good, be careful though, you were a special case, not many people would be able to make the jump that you did.” Harry advised, bringing that flattered little blush back to Eggsy’s cheeks.

“You might have to help me out here Harry, I feel I don’t know enough about your country and how things go here to make a good decision.” Gin said and Harry appreciated the honesty.

“Same here. I’ve been looking into candidates for the Merlin position, I’m starting to think the best thing for you would be to headhunt out of MI5 if you can, get someone already primed for this kind of job as I can’t be here to train them all the time.” Ginger added, the Merlin position proving to be a particularly large void to fill, not that that was surprising; Merlin had been one of a kind.

“I’d be happy to look over any of your suggestions, top universities aren’t a bad place to look Gin. As for the Merlin position you’re probably right, we can talk more on it later.” Harry said, Ginger giving him a nod.

“I know exactly where to look.” Tequila announced and then did not elaborate, Harry was already tired just thinking about what Tequila was going to bring to him.

Sure enough, a few weeks later Harry was looking down as Arthur at their cohort of candidates, some rougher but promising candidates from Eggsy, a group of astute looking graduates – thankfully not as arrogant as those that had been nominated for the Lancelot position – from Gin, a collection of ex-secret service men and women picked out by Harry.  And what Harry was slightly concerned might be strippers from Tequila.

Ah well, sometimes talent was found in the most unexpected places.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! The next chapter will be asap <3
> 
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